The Hague's Hidden Gem: Voco Hotel Review (You Won't Believe This!)
The Hague's Hidden Gem: Voco Hotel Review (You Won't Believe This!)
Okay, Here's the Lowdown (and the Laundry List) on This Place… Buckle Up.
Alright, so I just got back from… insert hotel name here… and honestly? My brain is still a little scrambled eggs. Trying to wrangle all this information into a coherent review feels a bit like herding caffeinated squirrels. But here goes nothing. Let's dive headfirst into this hotel labyrinth.
Accessibility - The Good, The Okay, and the "Hmm…"
Okay, first impressions. They say they're accessible. Honestly, I can't personally vouch for a full wheelchair experience (I'm ambulant, thank goodness!), but they claim to have facilities. Crucially, they tick the box for Wheelchair accessible but the devil is in the details, so I'm going to be frank: I didn't see a ton of ramps and wide doorways screaming accessibility. This needs a serious check, depending on individual needs. They did have an Elevator but if the lobby is a maze… yikes.
On-site accessible restaurants / lounges: Big question mark! I didn't see anything definitively labeled. Again, ask before you book. Don't assume.
Things that are crystal clear for access: Front desk [24-hour] - good for emergencies and late night arrivals.
Internet (Oh, The Sweet, Sweet Internet!)
Let's just say, in the modern world, a hotel that can't deliver on internet is a dealbreaker. Thankfully, this place… mostly delivers.
- Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! Yes! Praise be! This is the cornerstone of a good review for any digital nomad or even just your average person. Internet access – wireless is standard too. Hallelujah!
- Internet [LAN] They say LAN access too. But honestly? I’d bet on the Wi-Fi.
- Wi-Fi in public areas: Also a yes. Essential. You'd think, but… you'd be surprised.
Things to Do, Ways to Relax (Or, "Operation: Chill Out")
Ah, the "pampering" section. Now, I’m a sucker for a good spa day. Let's break it down…
- Spa: There's a spa. I saw it. It smelled vaguely of jasmine and hope. Score!
- Spa/sauna: Yes to this combination, yes.
- Sauna, Steamroom: Both present, supposedly super relaxing, didn’t get a chance to try myself (too busy writing this review. Priorities, people.)
- Pool with view, Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor]: Yes, to the pool. Outdoor pool. Likely the main feature. The pool looked nice too, although I have a feeling the view is… well, it depends on which room you're in. Mine faced the parking lot. Sigh.
- Fitness center, Gym/fitness: I saw a room vaguely resembling a gym. Again, I didn’t use it, because, you know, writing reviews. But it seemed functional, though I would love to see mirrors on machines!
- Massage, Body scrub, Body wrap, Foot bath: Sounds good, might make a return trip just for this!
Cleanliness and Safety (The Post-Apocalyptic Survival Guide)
Okay, so, let's talk about the elephant in the room (besides my luggage). COVID. The whole shebang.
- Anti-viral cleaning products: They say they use them. Take it with a grain of salt, but the important thing is…
- Daily disinfection in common areas: Okay, good. Showing they care.
- Hand sanitizer: Everywhere. Good!
- Professional-grade sanitizing services: Hopefully means what it says.
- Rooms sanitized between stays: Excellent.
- Staff trained in safety protocol: I hope they've mastered it.
- Safe dining setup, Sanitized kitchen and tableware items: Important.
- Physical distancing of at least 1 meter: Now where is that tape measure?!
- Room sanitization opt-out available: Hmm… makes me wonder why it's "opt-out."
- Hygiene certification: They should have it!
- Individually-wrapped food options: (See below).
- Doctor/nurse on call: Smart! Very comforting.
- First aid kit: Always a must.
- Sterilizing equipment: Good.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking (Fueling the Machine!)
Ah, the eating situation. This is where things became a little… well, let's just say the dining experience was a bit uneven. I’d probably be fine.
- Restaurants, A la carte in restaurant, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Desserts in restaurant, Soup in restaurant, Salad in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant, Asian cuisine in restaurant, International cuisine in restaurant: Yep, lots and lots of dining options, great for variety!
- Breakfast [buffet], Breakfast service, Buffet in restaurant, Asian breakfast, Western breakfast: Big buffet. Wide selection. Standard fare. Good if you need volume.
- Breakfast takeaway service: I saw a box, which is fantastic!
- Room service [24-hour]: Saved my bacon (literally). Sometimes you just need that midnight snack.
- Bar, Poolside bar, Happy hour: All present. They seemed…lively.
- Coffee shop, Snack bar: Caffeine and nibbles for the win!
- Bottle of water: They provided it. Always a nice touch.
- Alternative meal arrangement: Good for pickiness or dietary restrictions.
- Essential condiments: Yes!
- Sanitized kitchen and tableware items: Thank the gods!
- Individually-wrapped food options: A must in today’s world.
Services and Conveniences (The "Help Me Now" Section)
Okay, the helpful stuff. Here's where a hotel can truly win you over (or, in some cases, lose you completely).
- Air conditioning in public area, Air conditioning: Essential (thank god!).
- Business facilities, Meeting/banquet facilities, Meetings, Seminars: Clearly geared towards business travelers.
- Concierge: Helpful. If you need help with… anything.
- Currency exchange, Cash withdrawal: Useful!
- Daily housekeeping: A must. My room was a pigsty (it's the truth!).
- Doorman, Luggage storage: Nice to have.
- Elevator: Check.
- Food delivery: Yay!
- Gift/souvenir shop: Fine.
- Ironing service, Laundry service: Thank you, thank you, thank you.
- On-site event hosting, Audio-visual equipment for special events, Indoor venue for special events, Outdoor venue for special events, Wi-Fi for special events, Projector/LED display, Xerox/fax in business center, Meeting stationery: geared toward business.
- Invoice provided: Good for expenses.
- Cashless payment service: Easy and secure.
- Contactless check-in/out: Excellent!
- Convenience store: Very handy.
- Doorman: Great.
- Facilities for disabled guests: Hopefully more than just a checkbox.
- Pets allowed unavailable Pets allowed: No pets. Okay.
- Safety deposit boxes, Security [24-hour]: Peace of mind.
- Smoke alarms, Fire extinguisher, CCTV in common areas, CCTV outside property: Safety features are important!
- Car park [on-site], Car park [free of charge], Car power charging station, Valet parking, Taxi service, Airport transfer, Bicycle parking: Good options.
For the Kids (The "Keep 'Em Busy" Section)
- Babysitting service: Great.
- Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal: Looks like it is! Excellent.
Available in All Rooms (The Nitty Gritty)
Okay, let's talk about the rooms themselves. This is where things can get very personal.
- Air conditioning, Alarm clock, Bathrobes, Bathroom phone, Bathtub, Blackout curtains, Carpeting, Closet, Coffee/tea maker, Complimentary tea, Daily housekeeping, Desk, Extra long bed, Free bottled water, Hair dryer, High floor, In-room safe box, Interconnecting room(s) available, Internet access – LAN, Internet access – wireless, Ironing facilities, Laptop workspace, Linens, Mini bar, Mirror, Non-smoking, On-demand movies, Private bathroom, Reading light, Refrigerator, Safety/security feature, Satellite/cable channels, Scale, Seating area, Separate shower/bathtub, Shower, Slippers, Smoke detector, Socket near the bed, Sofa, Soundproofing, Telephone, Toiletries, Towels, Umbrella, Visual alarm, Wake-up service, Wi-Fi [free], Window that opens.
- Additional toilet: Not every room.
**The "Good, the
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Okay, buckle up buttercups, because this isn't your grandma's itinerary. This is the voco The Hague: A Slightly Disastrous Adventure. We're embracing the glorious mess of travel, alright? Prepare for opinions, over-enthusiasm, and the distinct possibility of me losing my passport somewhere along the way.
Day 1: Arrival & Almost Disaster - The Hague Awaits (and Maybe a Bit of Panic)
14:00: Arrive at Schiphol Airport (Amsterdam). Okay, first hurdle: getting through customs. Pray for me, this is where I start to panic. I'm convinced they can smell my pre-trip anxiety a mile off. Grab a train to The Hague Central Station. Fingers crossed I haven't already lost my tickets!
15:30: Arrive at The Hague Central Station. Wow, this place is…busy. Okay, deep breaths. Find a taxi (because dragging my suitcase a mile in the opposite direction of the hotel sounds like a form of torture).
16:00: Check into voco The Hague. First impressions are important! (Hoping the lobby isn't filled with screaming toddlers or, God forbid, a tour group chanting in unison.) The pics online look good, hope it's not a bait-and-switch. Find out my bed is the most crucial element, and make it really comfy.
17:00: Unpack. *The true test of my suitcase-packing abilities. How many outfits did I *really* need? The answer is always "all of them."* Scout the area for dinner options. This is where the real adventure begins. Finding a restaurant that isn't ridiculously overpriced and doesn't smell like stale fish is a quest in itself.
19:00: Dinner! Okay, this is where I'm REALLY counting on you all! I have done some research and am torn between the hip vibe of Bistro de Twee Heeren (the fish is supposedly amazing) and the reliably cozy Restaurant de Residentie (supposedly has great steaks). Decision time.
21:00: Post-dinner wander. Time to see if I can find a hidden gem, hopefully one that doesn't involve getting lost in a canal or accidentally stumbling into a political rally.
Day 2: Art, Anxiety, and Absolutely Amazing Stroopwafels
09:00: Breakfast at voco (hopefully, they do a decent scrambled egg. I'm a sucker for a good scrambled egg). Fuel up for a day of culture and possibly existential dread.
10:00: Visit the Mauritshuis. Hello, Vermeer! Prepare to be starstruck. Is seeing 'Girl with a Pearl Earring' worth the potential crowds? I’m hoping so. Actually, I’m not just hoping, I’m demanding it. Do NOT underwhelm me, Vermeer! This is going to be a MAJOR art moment. I can feel it. (And by "feel it", I mean I'll probably spend half the time worrying about accidentally bumping into another art lover.)
13:00: Lunch. Okay, gotta fuel up for the afternoon. Maybe grab some kibbeling (fried fish) near the waterfront? Or, if I'm feeling fancy (and brave), try a local sandwich shop. The thought of choosing is already making me anxious.
14:00: Wander through the Binnenhof. History time! The Dutch Parliament! I'll channel my inner historian and…probably get distracted by pigeons. Seriously though, cool buildings.
15:30: A STROOPWAFEL EMERGENCY! *This is not an optional activity. This is a *necessity.* Find the best stroopwafel in The Hague. Crisp edges, gooey center, and perfect for soaking up coffee. This is the stuff of dreams, friends. It's so important, it gets a separate line.*
16:30: Relax in the hotel room. Okay, all that culture is starting to feel a little overwhelming. Time for some serious chill. Maybe take a nap, maybe re-evaluate my life choices. Probably both.
19:00: Tonight's dinner is a mystery! *I'm going to venture out and find a completely unexpected restaurant. Maybe I'll try a place with live music, or maybe I’ll just eat all the cheesy bread I can find. I'll decide when I’m standing in front of the establishment."
21:00: Evening stroll near the beach. The Scheveningen beach! Okay, so it's probably going to be cold, but I can deal with that. This is where you let yourself breathe. Maybe. Probably. This is where any of the angst about my life will be put off until tomorrow.
Day 3: War & Wonder, and Winding Down (Hopefully with all Possessions)
09:00: Farewell, breakfast. Must get that scrambled egg one last time. Pack up the suitcase (again).
10:00: Visit the The Hague Peace Palace. This is the place I'm most excited about. Seeing where international law is made… and hoping I don’t accidentally start any global conflicts. This should be a fascinating and humbling experience.
12:00: Explore the Madurodam miniature park. Because who doesn't love tiny versions of everything? Plus, it’s a nice mental break from all the serious stuff.
13:30: Lunch. I'm thinking something light. I need to leave some space for the last stroopwafel of the trip (because, you know, priorities).
14:30: Final souvenir hunt. Gotta find something to remind me of this chaotic adventure. Probably end up with a keychain shaped like a tiny clog. Or something I'll regret buying later.
16:00: Relax at voco, maybe get a drink. Time to savor the last moments. Reflect on all the things I've seen, the food I've eaten, and the near-disasters I've survived. Hopefully, I haven’t left anything vital behind…like my passport.
18:00: Farewell dinner. I'm going to go back and try that same restaurant I loved the first day. The same place that felt warm and comforting, not like the rest of the city that felt a little like being in a museum.
20:00: Last-minute packing and pre-travel anxiety. Deep breaths. Maybe I should have added some extra days to the trip.
21:00: Head to train station. Praying I don't miss the train. Praying I have all my stuff. Praying I remember how to get home.
Day 4: Home (Maybe)
- 00:00: The trip back home. The relief and melancholy is the start of the ending. What a trip. What an adventure. I'll never forget it.
Okay, friends. Prepare for the inevitable chaos. Wish me luck. I'm going to need it.
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So, like, what *is* this thing anyway? (And why should I care?)
Ugh, fine. Deep breath. This "thing" is me, trying to answer your burning questions. Or maybe *your* burning questions are more like a lukewarm cup of tea—who am I to judge? But the point is, I'm supposed to be helpful. Why you should care? Hmm… well, if you're here, you *probably* have some burning questions of your own, right? Maybe you're curious about… (checks notes) …well, whatever *this* is about. Maybe you stumbled here by accident, like I stumbled into a conversation with my cat last week, thinking he *actually* understood physics. (He didn’t.) Either way, stay a while. It might get interesting. It might not. Life’s a gamble, folks.
What's the biggest mistake people make?
Oh, honey, the biggest mistake? Thinking they have all the answers. Look, I’m constantly learning, and that’s *after* a lifetime of screwing things up. People get it wrong when they assume things, right? When they skip the basics, rush to the end without seeing the whole picture, or think they're above starting from scratch. The problem is, we're all human. And being human means constantly tripping over your own feet, spilling coffee on your keyboard, and forgetting where you put your car keys. So embrace the mess, I say!
How do you handle [Specific Problem]?
Okay! Listen, I’m *terrible* at handling stuff. Honestly. Take yesterday, for example. I was supposed to be at a meeting, but my car battery died. Dead. Zero. Zilch. I spent a good hour panicking, calling roadside assistance (who were, bless their hearts, *slow*), and generally feeling like a complete failure.
But after the initial freak-out, I realized: Hey, a dead battery is just a dead battery. It sucks, yes. And it’s a major pain in the rear. But it's also solvable. So I took a breath, found alternative transportation, and managed to make it to the meeting, albeit late. This messy real-world stuff is what I'm all about
This all sounds complicated. Is it worth the effort?
Complicated? Maybe. Worth it? GOD, YES. I used to think everything had to be perfectly planned, perfectly executed. Such a ridiculous concept! It’s the mess, the bumps, the screw-ups that actually make life worth living. Those moments of “Oh, crap, what do I do now?” are where actual growth, actual learning, and actual EVERYTHING happens. So stop fretting about perfection. Embrace the chaos. Otherwise, what's the point?
Ok, But what if I do it wrong?
Oh, you *will* do it wrong. Guaranteed. I do it wrong almost daily! You learn more from your mistakes than you ever learn from your successes. Trust me. I once tried to bake a cake from a Pinterest recipe that looked *amazing*. It turned out to be a hockey puck that could double as a doorstop. The frosting was a sugary, gloopy mess. BUT! I learned that I'm a terrible baker AND that I need to read recipes *very* carefully. And *that*, my friends, is progress. So go on! Make all kinds of mess. That’s how you learn.
Is there a secret?
The secret? There is *no* secret. Well, okay, maybe there’s one. The secret is that there's no secret. It’s a cliché, I know. Breathe. Try. Fail. Learn. Repeat. It sounds simple, but it’s deceptively hard. It's like trying to explain the color blue to someone who's never seen it. You can use all the words, but ultimately, you just have to point and say, "See? *That*." So go out there. See *that*. Mess things up a little. And laugh when you do. Because, honestly, what else are you going to do?
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