**Escape to Paradise: All-Inclusive Luxury at Daima Biz Hotel, Kemer**
**Escape to Paradise: All-Inclusive Luxury at Daima Biz Hotel, Kemer**
Escape to (Almost) Paradise: My Rollercoaster Ride at Daima Biz Hotel, Kemer – Buckle Up, Buttercups!
Okay, buckle up, because I’m about to spill the tea (and maybe some Turkish coffee) on Daima Biz Hotel in Kemer. They claim all-inclusive luxury, and well…let's just say it's more like an all-inclusive experience. It's got its highs, its lows, its "huh?" moments, and a whole lot of sunshine. My review? Prepare for a messy, honest, and hopefully hilarious account.
First Impressions… and a Minor Panic Attack (Accessibility & Check-In):
Right off the bat, accessibility was… a mixed bag. They say they have facilities for disabled guests, and yes, there's an elevator! But the ramp to the main entrance felt a bit like driving up Mount Everest on a tiny scooter. The hotel itself felt sprawling, and my internal fitness tracker registered a workout just navigating to my room.
Speaking of rooms! Mine was…fine. More on that later. Check-in was supposed to be contactless, but I swear, it felt slower than a snail race. Maybe they were still ironing out the kinks. Got my room key and went on my way.
Room, Sweet Room (…Mostly Good):
Okay, the room itself. Available in all rooms? Yep, that's the air conditioning, and bless it, because Kemer is a furnace. Air Conditioning? Check. Alarm clock? Probably. I slept through it. Bathrobes? Mmm-hmm, comfy and fluffy. Bathroom phone? Seriously? What is this, 1995? Bathtub? Yes, but it was kinda small. Blackout curtains? Thank god you're reading this, because the sun is intense. Coffee/tea maker? Absolutely. Daily housekeeping? Indeed. They even left little chocolates on my pillow. Adorable. Desk? Standard. Extra long beds? Nope. They're kinda short. Free bottled water? Plenty. Hair dryer? Yep. High floor? Nope, I didn't get the luxury this time. In-room safe box? Yes, and I never figured out how to use it. Internet access – wireless? Free Wi-Fi! (And yes, they loudly proclaim “Free Wi-Fi in all rooms!”). Ironing facilities? Yup. Laptop workspace? Sure. Mini bar? Filled with the goodies! Non-smoking? Thank goodness. Private bathroom? Yep. Refrigerator? Yep. Satellite/cable channels? Loads of them. Shower? Okay. Slippers? Yes! Smoke detector? Let's hope so. Sofa? Nope. Telephone? Check. Toiletries? Basic, but fine. Towels? Plenty. Wake-up service? I think it worked. Window that opens? No way!
But! The soundproofing was… questionable. I could hear the hotel pool party at 3 AM which was annoying but got me to the pool the next morning a little buzzed so I could feel like I was part of the party.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking – Prepare for the Buffet Gauntlet:
Alright, the food scene. This is where things got interesting. Breakfast [buffet]? Oh, yes. A massive buffet. Buffet in restaurant? The entire hotel seemed to be the buffet restaurant! There was a certain chaos to it. Finding a table felt like a competitive sport. The food itself was…varied. Some delights, some… "meh." Asian breakfast? I’m not sure it was actually an Asian breakfast, but it was labelled that. Coffee/tea in restaurant? Adequate. Desserts in restaurant? The desserts were the highlight. International cuisine in restaurant? Yes, they tried. Vegetarian restaurant? Hmm, kinda, but options were limited. Western breakfast? Scrambled eggs and sausage? Sure!
I spent a lot of time at the poolside bar, which, granted, had some truly horrible cocktails, but hey, free is free! Don't expect nuanced mixology, folks. Restaurants? There are a few a la carte places, which you have to pay for, and yes, they were so much better than the buffet.
Cleanliness and Safety: A Bit of a Mixed Bag:
Listen, Daima Biz tried to be Covid-safe. They had hand sanitizer everywhere. Lots of signs. Staff trained in safety protocol. Daily disinfection in common areas. They provided individually-wrapped food options and safe dining setup. And I saw evidence of professional-grade sanitizing services.
However… I did witness a server sneeze into the food, and, well, there wasn’t a lot of anti-viral cleaning products being used at that point. I also didn’t see any of the promised physical distancing of at least 1 meter.
Things to Do (or, How to Avoid Boredom):
So, swimming pool? Yeah, a giant one. Swimming pool [outdoor]? Absolutely. Pretty nice, too, with a view. Pool with view? Yes. You’re swimming in a giant pool, looking at other hotels.
They also had a fitness center, which I briefly entered. It looked…well-used. Gym/fitness? Yep. Sauna? Yep. Spa/sauna? You bet. Steamroom? Yep. I skipped the Body scrub and Body wrap. But they had a Massage, too, and that was pretty good!
Services and Conveniences – The Good, the Bad, and the Comically Inconsistent:
Okay, where do I begin? They had Air conditioning in public area (thank you!). Cash withdrawal? Yes. Concierge? Sort of. They said they'd help with excursions, but I think they were still trying to figure out their own schedules. Convenience store? Yup, overpriced, but it was there. Daily housekeeping? Generally good. Dry cleaning? Available. Elevator? Yes. Facilities for disabled guests? See my earlier accessibility rant. Laundry service? Yes. Luggage storage? Yes. Safe deposit boxes? They are available.
For the kids? They had a babysitting service (didn't try it). Kids facilities? Yes. Kids meal? Yes!
Getting Around:
Airport transfer? Yes, but expensive. Car park [free of charge]? Yeah. Taxi service? Available.
The Verdict: Worth it? Maybe.
Honestly? Daima Biz Hotel is an experience. It’s not perfect. It has its quirks. It feels a little… chaotic at times. But honestly, if you go into it with the right expectations – a willingness to laugh at the imperfections, embrace the slightly-off vibe, and drink a few too many questionable cocktails – you might have a great time. It's not true luxury. It can be fun. Just don't expect heaven on earth.
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- Title: Escape to (Almost) Paradise: My Rollercoaster Ride at Daima Biz Hotel, Kemer – A Messy Review
- Keywords: Daima Biz Hotel, Kemer, All Inclusive, Review, Turkey, Accessibility, Swimming Pool, Spa, Sauna, Fitness Center, Buffet, Restaurant, Food, Cleanliness, Safety, Family Friendly, Hotel Review, Travel, Holiday.
- Meta Description: Honest, and hilarious review of Daima Biz Hotel in Kemer, including accessibility, dining, activities, and the all-inclusive experience. Prepare for a chaotic but fun adventure!
- H1: Escape to (Almost) Paradise: My Rollercoaster Ride at Daima Biz Hotel, Kemer – A Messy Review
- H2 & Paragraph Keywords Used Throughout: Accessibility, on-site restaurants, wheelchair accessible, internet access, free Wi-Fi, things to do, ways to relax, body scrub, body wrap, fitness center, gym, massage, pool, sauna, spa, steamroom, swimming pool, cleanliness and safety, anti-viral cleaning, breakfast, cashless payment, daily disinfection, doctor/nurse on call, rooms, daily housekeeping, staff trained in safety, Asian breakfast, Asian cuisine, bar, buffet, coffee, desserts, international cuisine, poolside bar, restaurants, room service, salad, snack bar, vegetarian, western breakfast, western cuisine, services, air conditioning, business facilities, concierge, contactless check-in, convenience store, daily housekeeping, doorman, dry cleaning, elevator, facilities for disabled guests, food delivery, gift shop, indoor venue, invoice, ironing service, laundry service, luggage storage, meeting, safety, smoking area, terrace, for the kids, babysitting service, family friendly, kids facilities, access, check-in, couple's room, fire extinguisher, front desk, hotel chain, non-smoking rooms, pets allowed, safety/security, security, smoke alarms, soundproof rooms, airport transfer, bicycle parking, car park, car power charging station, taxi service, valet parking, air conditioning, alarm clock, bathrobes
Okay, buckle up, buttercups, because we're about to dive headfirst into the glorious (and potentially disastrous) all-inclusive vortex of the Daima Biz Hotel in Kemer, Turkey. Forget your perfectly manicured itineraries; this one's gonna be a hot mess – just like me after the third free cocktail. Here we go:
Daima Biz: My Kemer Chaos Chronicle - All-Inclusive Edition
Day 1: Arrival and the Great Pool Panic
08:00 AM (ish) - Antalya Airport to Daima Biz: The Van of Doom. The shuttle. Oh, the shuttle. Imagine a tin can on wheels, packed with a delightful assortment of jetlagged tourists, all sweating and slightly grumpy. I'm already regretting that extra shot of espresso at the airport. The driver, bless his soul, navigates the winding coastal roads like he's auditioning for Fast & Furious: Kemer Edition. I cling to the barf bag in my purse for dear life.
10:00 AM - Hotel Arrival: The Welcome (and the Confusion). The lobby. Big, marble-y, and smelling faintly of air freshener and desperation. Check-in… or rather, the check-in saga. Let's just say there's a significant language barrier between me and the receptionist. After much pointing, Googling, and a near-meltdown involving a lost passport (it wasn’t, thankfully!), I'm finally in my room. First impressions: clean-ish. View: Meh.
11:00 AM - The Pool: A Chlorine-Fueled Odyssey. I'm immediately drawn to the pool. Clearly, I need to de-stress! I head straight for it, envisioning serene relaxation. HAH! Turns out it's a madhouse. Kids cannonballing, inflatable flamingos colliding, a guy with a speedo I'd rather unsee. I get a sunbed, finally. I spend 10 minutes trying to get a good position. I finally find a good spot next to a very loud family. The pool is a good place to people!
1:00 PM - Lunch: The Buffet Battleground. Lunch! The buffet. It’s a free-for-all. Plates piled precariously high, a symphony of clanging cutlery, and a bewildering array of food choices. I start with salad (healthy, you know). Then I get an idea. I try everything. I end up with a plate of mystery meat, a questionable sauce, and a slice of suspiciously neon green melon. I eat it. I survive.
2:00 PM - Siesta? Yeah, Right. I try to nap after lunch, I really do. But my brain is overstimulated, the family next to me are in a full-blown argument, and the air conditioning sounds like a dying dinosaur. I give up and go to the pool.
4:00 PM - The Pool, Take Two (and the Sunburn). I spend another attempt to relax. I get a sunburn. I get a sunburn. I realize I haven't put on sunscreen.
6:00 PM - Dinner: The Meatball Massacre. Dinner is another buffet showdown. The highlight, unfortunately, is the "meatballs". I think they're meatballs. Or maybe they're hockey pucks. I'm not sure. I get one. I cautiously bite it… and then decide to stick with the bread.
8:00 PM - The “Entertainment”: A Turkish Delight of… Something. The evening entertainment. Okay, I’m putting this gently: It was… an experience. The "show" featured some questionable choreography, a lot of loud music, and a man in a sequined jumpsuit. I sip my free, questionably-colored cocktail and try to find some entertainment. I end up laughing. Hard. I also meet Steve. He’s from Manchester. He’s already been up to the bar three times.
Day 2: Exploring (Maybe), and the Cocktail Conundrum
- 9:00 AM - Breakfast: The Egg Incident. Breakfast! Eggs are my passion. I approach the omelet station with high hopes. Disaster strikes. I try to order on. The cook, bless his heart, misunderstands everything. I end up with an omelet that resembles something. I eat it.
- 10:00 AM - Kemer Town: Venture into the Unknown (Maybe). Okay, the plan was to explore Kemer. I am not sure how it would work. I head out to the street. After 10 minutes I'm overcome with the heat, return back to the hotel, and go to the pool.
- 12:00 PM - Lunch: Still at the Buffet. Lunch. I end up at the buffet. The same one. The same chaos. I meet a guy, who is going to all-inclusive hotels for about 20 years and is very enthusiastic about them. I listen to him.
- 2:00 PM - The Pool: More Sun, More Cocktails, More Steve. I'm starting to get a tan. Steve is back at the bar. He's quite entertaining. Our bond is strengthened. We talk about the lack of entertainment.
- 5:00 PM - The Cocktail Conundrum. The cocktails. They come free! They are also… potent. The variety is impressive, but the quality is questionable. After two, I feel… relaxed. After four, I’m singing karaoke. After six… I think I forget what happened.
- 7:00 PM - Dinner 2.0: The Unexpected Culinary Rescue. The dinner. I walk back to the restaurant. I am quite hungry. Much to my surprise, there is a Turkish night! I get a whole bunch of great food. The staff is great. I eat way too much.
- 9:00 PM - The Karaoke Catastrophe (and Steve's Redemption). Karaoke. Oh, God. I sing (I'm pretty sure it doesn't sound like singing though). Steve's on stage. He sounds amazing. He wins the prize!
Day 3: Seasickness, Seafood, and the Final Farewell (Maybe)
- 10:00 AM - Boat Trip: The Waves of Regret. A boat trip! Sounds delightful, right? Wrong. I'm horribly seasick after about 30 minutes. The waves are rough. I spend most of the trip clinging to the railing, contemplating the meaning of life while staring into the (slightly green-tinged) sea. Note to self: seasickness pills are your friend.
- 12:00 PM - Lunch on the Boat: The Unforgettable Fish. Lunch on the boat, supposedly fresh seafood. I'm not sure. I barely touch it. All I want is solid ground under my wobbly feet.
- 2:00 PM - Back to the Hotel: Sweet, Sweet Land. Back to the hotel! I collapse onto the sunbed, promising myself I need to recover from this experience. I spend the next 2 hours doing just that.
- 4:00 PM - One Last Pool Dip (And the Final Cocktail Assault). One last attempt at pool relaxation. One last, glorious cocktail. I vow to take things easy. I fail miserably.
- 7:00 PM - Farewell Dinner: The bittersweet goodbye. The final dinner. I share a meal with Steve. There are tears, promises to stay in touch, and a shared understanding of the glorious chaos that is an all-inclusive holiday.
- 9:00 PM: Packing and Departure. I reluctantly pack my bags, trying to make some sense of all the food I've eaten and all the cocktails I've swilled. I head with mixed feelings.
Final Thoughts:
The Daima Biz Hotel wasn't perfect. It was messy, loud, and occasionally a little… questionable. But it was also fun, freeing, and offered an experience that I will look back on fondly. Will I go back? Maybe. Probably. With more sunscreen, more seasickness pills, and a whole lot more acceptance of the beautiful, chaotic mess.
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Escape to Paradise: Daima Biz Hotel, Kemer - The REALLY Unfiltered FAQs!
Okay, so... Is "All-Inclusive Luxury" actually, you know, LUXURIOUS at Daima Biz? I mean, REALLY luxurious? Or, you know, "luxury" according to a budget hotel's definition?
Alright, let's be honest, the “luxury” thing... it’s a spectrum, right? They definitely try. The lobby *is* grand, with those ridiculously oversized chandeliers that scream "I have money!" (and I probably don't). The rooms? Pretty decent. Not dripping in gold leaf, mind you. My first thought? "Huh, okay, this is… nice." Second thought, after staring at the mini-bar longingingly? "Where's the champagne in my 'all-inclusive' experience?!" (It wasn't there, FYI. You'll have to pay extra for the REALLY fancy stuff. Annoying.)
Look, it's not the Burj Al Arab, alright? But the beds were comfy, the aircon worked (a HUGE win), and the view (once you strategically positioned yourself) was pretty spectacular. The marble in the bathroom definitely felt…luxury-adjacent. I’d give it a solid…7 out of 10 on the “pretentious luxury” scale. Good enough. Just don’t expect a butler to fan you with palm leaves. (Though, wouldn't THAT be something?)
Tip: Pack your own bath bombs. Trust me. Makes EVERYTHING feel fancier.
The Food, The Food! What's the deal? Because All-Inclusive buffets… can be a rollercoaster.
Oh, the food. *Deep sigh*. Okay, so the main buffet… it’s like a culinary adventure where you’re not always entirely sure what direction you’re headed. There's a LOT. Like, an insane amount of choices. And about halfway through the week I swear I started seeing repeats... but hey, variety is the spice of life, right?
The Turkish night buffet was the highlight, hands down. They had these amazing kebabs cooked on an actual grill outside. Pure. Heaven. (I might have eaten three. Don't judge.) The rest of the time? It’s a mixed bag. Some days you're like, "Ooh, this is delicious!" Other days you're quietly contemplating the origins of that mystery meat. The desserts were a bit samey, and let's not even talk about the "coffee". Anyway, I survived. And maybe added a few pounds. It's all part of the "all-inclusive" experience, isn't it?
Anecdote: I swear I saw the same guy hoard like, 12 croissants every morning! The bread! I could never get near it!
Tip: Don't be afraid to try EVERYTHING. Even the things that look a little… suspicious. You might surprise yourself. And definitely hit up the a la carte restaurants. Those were actually quite good.
The Pools and Beach - Are they as good as the glossy photos make them seem? Because those photos are always LYING, aren't they?
Alright, alright, let's talk water. The pools are pretty darn good. There’s one for kids, one for adults (Hallelujah!), and a few scattered around. The main pool? Can get a bit crowded, especially in the afternoon. The good news? There's ALWAYS a sunbed to be found, if you're willing to wake up at the crack of dawn (and the Germans already haven’t claimed it... which is, let's be honest, the real battle).
The beach? Okay, here's the real truth: it's pebbly. REALLY pebbly. Like, you'll want water shoes pebbly. But the water is crystal clear, and the view of the mountains is just… breathtaking. Totally worth it. Just… pack water shoes. Trust me, my feet are still recovering. Oh, and the bar on the beach? That's a definite plus. Who doesn't love a cocktail with a view?
Emotional Reaction: I loved the beach so much I forgot my water shoes and felt like a fool every single time I went. *facepalm*
Tip: Invest in some decent water shoes. You won’t regret it. And try to snag a sunbed closer to the beach bar. Life is short. Drink a cocktail.
What's the deal with the Entertainment? All-inclusive resorts are notorious for… well, being a bit cheesy.
Okay, the entertainment… Embrace the cheese, my friends. Seriously. There were definitely nights where I was like, "Did I accidentally wander onto a cruise ship?" The animation team works HARD. They're enthusiastic. A little *too* enthusiastic sometimes. There's the usual pool games, water aerobics (which, surprisingly, I actually enjoyed), and then the evening shows.
The shows? A mixed bag, to say the least. One night they had a Turkish folk dancing show. It was…colorful. Another night? A weird "magic show" that involved a lot of… sawing people in half (presumably not permanently). The kids? They LOVE it. The other adults? Well, let's just say there's plenty of people watching to be done.
Quirky Observation: It’s amazing how fast a group of people can learn the moves to the same cheesy dance routine. We all became one big, sweaty, happy group. Actually, it was kinda nice.
Tip: Don't take it too seriously. Embrace the ridiculousness. Have a few cocktails. And be prepared to participate. Who knows, you might even enjoy yourself.
Is there anything REALLY annoying about Daima Biz? Because there ALWAYS is something…
Ugh, yes. Every place has got its quirks, right? The main annoyance? The Wi-Fi. Don't even bother expecting a lightning-fast connection. It's…spotty. And often non-existent. Prepare to go off the grid. Which, I guess, *could* be a good thing if you're trying to escape the real world. But if you need to stay connected (like, to actually WORK or, you know, post those enviable vacation photos), good luck.
Then, the towel situation. Prepare to play the towel game. You know the one? You have to get your towel from the designated towel stand (always a bit of a trek), and then sign it in and out. It's a whole rigmarole. And if you lose your towel? Prepare to pay. Luckily, I avoided this. But I saw others get caught out. It was brutal.
Emotional Reaction: That Wi-Fi. I wanted to scream. I *did* scream a little, when I was trying to upload a photo of the sunset, and it just… wouldn't. Argh!
Tip: Download all your Netflix shows beforehand. And hoard your towels. Just kidding… kinda.
Would you go back?
Hmm... That's a tough one. Overall, yeah, I would. Despite the pebbly beach, the questionable Wi-Fi, and the occasional culinary mystery, I had a REALLY good time. The staff were friendly, the location isEscape to Paradise: Engel Gourmet & Spa, Nova Levante, Italy
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