Escape to Paradise: Hotel Rural Fuente La Teja Awaits!
Escape to Paradise: Hotel Rural Fuente La Teja Awaits!
Escape to Paradise? Fuente La Teja: My Chaotic, Mostly-Wonderful Spanish Sojourn!
Okay, buckle up, buttercups, because my "escape to paradise" at Hotel Rural Fuente La Teja was… well, it was something. Let’s just say it wasn’t the perfectly-filtered Instagram dream, and thank heavens for that. It was, in its own messy, gloriously imperfect way, utterly charming. This review is going to be LONG. Just warning you. Because honestly, after all that was a lot to unpack.
First Impressions & Accessibility (or Lack Thereof…):
The website promised a rural idyll. And it mostly delivered. The drive to Fuente La Teja was stunning, winding through rolling hills and little villages like something out of a postcard… until my GPS (bless its digital heart) led me down a dirt track that definitely wasn't on the postcard.
Accessibility: This is where things got a little… hiccup-y. The hotel itself, a beautifully renovated building (more on that later!), tried to be accessible. Elevator: Check! Rooms with facilities for disabled guests: Supposedly, but honestly, I didn't poke around in those enough to say. Access to the main areas was okay-ish, but the cobblestone courtyards? Forget about it in a wheelchair. My ankle, however… well, let's just say I learned to admire the vistas at a slower pace after that stumble. Wheelchair accessible: Nah, wouldn't say fully. Some effort was present, but still a far cry from ideal.
Internet & Tech Shenanigans:
Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! This was a big selling point for me. I needed to stay connected. And mostly, it worked! Internet access – wireless, Internet Access – LAN, Internet, Internet Services. There was a LAN port in the room (remember those?), and the Wi-Fi… well, it was a bit like a chatty, unreliable friend. Sometimes great, sometimes disappearing for hours. Thank goodness for my international roaming! Free Wi-Fi in public areas: A bit patchy, but hey, who needs the internet when you have… well, more about that later. Laptop workspace, desk: The desks were lovely and the rooms contained everything you needed.
Things To Do, Ways To Relax (Or: My Body Got Pampered!)
This is where Fuente La Teja really shone. Pool with view: Yes, and oh my god, it was breathtaking. Picture this: infinity pool overlooking a valley, the sun warming your skin, a glass of something bubbly in your hand (more on that later). Outdoor Swimming pool: The same pool, but I had to specify that it was so lovely I had to mention it twice. Bliss. Spa: A proper spa! Sauna, Steamroom, Spa/sauna: Yep, a total relaxation playground. I'm not a big sauna person (too hot!), but the steam room was heavenly, melting away all my life's stresses (and the dust from that dirt track!). Massage, Body scrub, Body wrap: I indulged! The massage therapist was incredible. I'd never had a body scrub or wrap before, and I'm now a convert. I felt like a new person, smooth as a baby's… well, you get the idea. Gym/fitness, Fitness center: Small, but functional. I only popped in once to avoid the impending guilt of all the tapas. Foot bath: This was a unique experience, and I'm still not quite sure what to make of it. Relaxing, but… weirdly ticklish.
Cleanliness and Safety (Important in These Times):
They took COVID seriously, thankfully. Hand sanitizer everywhere. Daily disinfection in common areas. Rooms sanitized between stays. Staff trained in safety protocol. All the standard stuff, but with a genuine air of care. Anti-viral cleaning products. Individually-wrapped food options: A big plus. Safe dining setup. Physical distancing of at least 1 meter: Mostly enforced. Rooms sanitization opt-out available: Good option. Staff trained in safety protocol: They seemed well-trained. Sanitized kitchen and tableware items. Felt safe. Cashless payment service. Doctor/nurse on call. (Didn't need them, thankfully!) The whole place felt clean, and like they actually gave a damn about the wellbeing of their guests.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking (AKA: Where I Found My Happiness)
Okay, where do I even begin? The food at Fuente La Teja was a highlight, full stop. I gained at least five pounds, and I have zero regrets!
Restaurants, A la carte in restaurant, Buffet in restaurant: There was a restaurant for almost every mood. Lunch by the pool? Done. Romantic dinner with incredible views? Absolutely. The a la carte menu was excellent, and the buffet was… dangerous. Breakfast [buffet], Western Breakfast, Asian Breakfast: The breakfast buffet was a work of art. A La Carte Restaurant: The food was excellent, as mentioned. Restaurants I have to say it again.
Bar, Poolside bar, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Coffee shop, Happy hour: The bar was fantastic, and the bar staff became friends. Poolside bar: Yes, again! Coffee/tea in restaurant: Excellent coffee. Coffee shop: Same. Happy Hour – need I say more? Salad in restaurant: Delightful. Soup in restaurant: Comforting. Desserts in restaurant: Oh, the desserts. Bottle of water, Room Room service [24-hour]: Nice touch. I took advantage of room service after a very long massage. Vegetarian restaurant, Asian cuisine in restaurant, Western cuisine in restaurant, International cuisine in restaurant: They cater to diverse tastes. Snake Bar Snack Bar was very helpful.
The biggie: The "Restaurant" Experience:
I'm going to dedicate an entire section to one specific dinner because it encapsulates the whole experience. It was a Saturday night, and the main restaurant was bustling. I’d had a fantastic massage earlier, and I was feeling utterly euphoric. I ordered the paella (because, Spain!), and it was… well, it was okay. Not the best I've ever had. But!
The Imperfect Perfection:
The waiter, a young guy with a dazzling smile, clearly knew the menu inside and out, but he was slammed. He was juggling about ten tables. There was a slight mix-up with my order (a common occurrence, apparently - Spain runs on a different time zone!). I waited, and waited. Then, the most glorious apology arrived, along with a complimentary plate of tapas – tiny, flavorful bites of heaven. And then, the sunset. Oh, the sunset! It painted the sky in all these fiery colours, and I just sat there, on the terrace, sipping my wine, nibbling my tapas, feeling utterly, wonderfully… present.
The imperfection of the slightly delayed paella, the charming chaos of the service… it all added to the charm. It was real. It was human. And it was far more memorable than some sterile, perfectly executed meal. It turned out to be the best paella I've ever had, because it was about more than the food.
Services and Conveniences (The Little Things That Matter):
Air conditioning in public area, Concierge, Daily housekeeping, Doorman, Elevator, Facilities for disabled guests, Food delivery, Gift/souvenir shop, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage, Meeting/banquet facilities, Outdoor venue for special events, Safety deposit boxes, Terrace, Wi-Fi for special events: They had everything. Honestly, the service was impeccable. The concierge was a lifesaver. Daily housekeeping: The room was always spotless. Luggage storage: Easy. Safety deposit boxes: Important. Gift/souvenir shop: Cute stuff!
Services and Conveniences cont…:
Audio-visual equipment for special events, Business facilities, Cash withdrawal, Contactless check-in/out, Convenience store, Currency exchange, Dry cleaning, Essential condiments, Indoor venue for special events, Meetings, Meeting stationery, On-site event hosting, Projector/LED display, Seminars, Shrine, Smoking area, Xerox/fax in business center, Wi-Fi for special events: They had this too. I didn't use much, but there if you needed.
For the Kids (Bless Their Little Hearts):
Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal: I wasn't traveling with kids, but I saw a few families, and the hotel seemed well-equipped to handle them. Lots of space, a pool, and kid-friendly menu options.
Rooms and All That Jazz:
**Available in all rooms, Additional toilet, Air conditioning, Alarm clock, Bathrobes, Bathroom phone, Bathtub, Blackout curtains, Carpeting, Closet, Coffee/tea maker, Complimentary tea, Daily housekeeping, Desk, Extra long bed, Free bottled water, Hair dryer, High floor, In-room safe box, Interconnecting room(s) available, Internet access – LAN, Internet access – wireless, Ironing facilities, Laptop workspace, Linens, Mini bar, Mirror, Non-smoking, On-demand movies, Private bathroom, Reading light, Refrigerator, Safety
Johannesburg's Hidden Gem: Avant Garde Lodge Unveiled!
Okay, buckle up, buttercup. This isn't your glossy travel brochure itinerary. This is real life hitting the cobbled streets of Guejar-Sierra. Prepare for a trip that's less "perfectly planned" and more "wonderfully chaotic."
Hotel Rural Fuente La Teja, Guejar-Sierra, Spain: Embracing the Mess
Day 1: Arrival and the Great Olive Oil Debacle (aka, Welcome to the Mountains!)
- Morning (Or, Let's Be Honest, Early Afternoon): Flying into Granada. The flight was fine, but the lady next to me kept hitting me with her elbow. Seriously, I thought I was going to develop a black eye. Then, the car rental. Let's just say navigating Spanish roundabouts in a manual car when you haven't driven one in a decade is…an experience. More like several near-death experiences.
- Afternoon: FINALLY arrived at Fuente La Teja. The drive up was breathtaking, a dizzying ascent into the Sierra Nevada. The hotel itself? A little slice of heaven. Stone walls, exposed beams, fire places… Sigh. Immediately felt the stress melt away almost entirely.
- The Olive Oil Incident: Right after settling in, I thought I'd be a clever cook. Decided to make myself a quick salad using olive oil from the hotel's supply…but I spilled half the bottle on the counter. And me? In a moment of panic, I tried to soak it up with the only thing close (my travel tee). It was a beautiful moment of mess.
- Evening: Dinner at the hotel restaurant. Ordered the "cordero" (lamb). It was probably the best lamb I've ever eaten. The kind of lamb that makes you close your eyes and moan slightly. Ate it while listening to the clatter of dishes, people chattering in Spanish, and laughing with all the folks having a good time, full of food and cheer.
Day 2: Hikes, Heights, and a Brush with Altitude Sickness (The Adventure Begins!)
- Morning: Woke up feeling like I'd been run over by a donkey (possibly because of the lamb?). But the view from the window was worth it. After a terrible attempt to make coffee, and even worse hair, I set off for a hike in the mountains. The air was crisp, the sun was warm, and the scenery was, well, unreal. Towering peaks, hidden valleys, the whole shebang.
- The Hike: Chose a "moderate" trail. (My definition of "moderate" and the locals' definitions might have differed slightly.) Turns out, "moderate" in the Sierra Nevada translates to "climbing a small mountain." The views were worth it, but I felt like I was going to pass out at one point. Altitude sickness is not fun, folks. Definitely carried snacks.
- Afternoon: Collapsed back at the hotel. Took a ridiculously long nap. Woke up feeling slightly more human.
- Evening: Wandered into the small village of Guejar-Sierra. Found a tiny tapas bar. Ate patatas bravas (spicy potatoes) and drank a hefty glass of local wine. Tried some basic Spanish (which, let's be honest, is more like attempting to speak in interpretive dance). Lots of pointing and laughing. It was great.
Day 3: Rest, Relaxation, the Perfect Picture and a Disappearing Camera (The Ups and Downs!)
- Morning: Decided to be a lazy bum. Spent the morning on the hotel patio, sipping coffee (the second attempt was better) and reading a book. Pure bliss. Stared at the mountains. Started to feel human again.
- Afternoon: Tried to take some amazing travel photos. Did a photoshoot on the patio. Actually proud of myself, the lighting was perfect. Then, headed out to a viewpoint of the Sierra Nevada mountain range, and took the most perfect picture. A moment of magic. Then I realized my memory card was full. I just stared at the mountain for a bit.
- The Disappearing Camera: So, went back to the hotel. Had a great lunch. Took the camera out to admire the pictures. And it wasn't there. Where was it? I retraced my steps, searching everywhere. Back at the viewpoint, around some trees, checked under tables. Finally, I asked the hotel staff, who tried to help. I was distraught.
- Evening: The hotel staff found it! Someone saw me taking pictures at lunch and recognized the camera. The relief I felt was immense. Celebrating with a glass of wine, I actually felt good, a little foolish, but good. Dinner was delicious, and after the ordeal, I slept soundly.
Day 4: A Detour, a Market, and a Day of Joy
- Morning: A detour to a local market. So many lovely things to see! Local produce, beautiful pottery… and the market was filled with chatty Spaniards, and the sights and sounds were amazing. I bought some cured ham and some hard cheese. Yum!
- Afternoon: Back at the hotel, spent the afternoon simply enjoying the sunshine and the sounds of the countryside. It felt idyllic. Then I fell in the pool! Fully clothed. It was a laugh, the staff joined in, and it became the best moment of the trip.
- Evening: A final, reflective dinner in the restaurant. Ate the pasta, and it was perfect. Walked the grounds of the hotel at night with the stars above me, reflecting on my time there.
Day 5: Leaving and the Unfinished Business (The Goodbye)
- Morning: A final breakfast, filled with sadness. A final walk around the hotel grounds. Said goodbye to the staff, and thanked them for everything.
- Afternoon: The drive back to Granada airport. The views were just as spectacular as the first time. A final appreciation of the amazing views.
- Evening: The flight back to reality. Already planning my return.
Things I Learned:
- Pack more comfortable shoes.
- Learn some basic Spanish before going.
- Don't be afraid to embrace the mess. That's where the real adventure is.
- Check the memory card!
- Always get the lamb.
So, that's it. My messy, imperfect, utterly wonderful trip to Fuente La Teja and Guejar-Sierra. It wasn't perfect, but it was real. And I wouldn't have had it any other way. Now, where to next…?
Unbelievable Datong Hotel Deal: Thank Inn Shanxi Review!
Okay, *Escape to Paradise*... sounds cheesy, right? Is Fuente La Teja actually *that* amazing?
Alright, look. "Paradise" is doing a *lot* of heavy lifting in the marketing, I'll admit. But Fuente La Teja… well, it's got its moments. I went with my partner, thinking it'd be a romantic getaway. Spoiler alert: it *mostly* was, but not without a few… *adventures*. The scenery? Seriously stunning. Think rolling green hills, the air smelling of damp earth and wildflowers. Like something out of a ridiculously expensive chocolate commercial. The hotel itself? Rustic charm personified, with exposed beams and a fireplace that *actually* works. (Unlike, ahem, the one in my apartment – which, for the record, is NOT paradise). But...and this is a BIG but... the WiFi was spotty. And I NEED my Insta-stories, okay?! That was a low blow.
The food! TELL ME about the food! I live to eat. Did this "Paradise" restaurant live up to expectations?
Oh, the food. Okay, so, the breakfast? Divine. Proper local bread, the pastries were flaky and utterly sinful, and the ham... I swear I could have eaten a whole leg of it. The dinner... well, it was a bit more... *variable*. One night, we had the most incredible slow-cooked lamb, literally falling off the bone. I thought I might cry from happiness. The next night? A slightly overcooked chicken thing that made my partner, bless his sweet heart, try to discreetly hide under his napkin. Look, they're clearly trying, and the ingredients are super fresh and local. But perfection? No. But the good nights were REALLY good, so I'd say it's worth the gamble. Just... maybe check the TripAdvisor reviews before you order. And maybe bring a granola bar, just in case.
What's the vibe? Is it a bougie, pretentious place or a relaxed, welcoming atmosphere?
The vibe, thank god, is definitely the latter. It leaned more towards relaxed country-chic than "we only drink imported water." I saw a few Instagram influencers trying *very* hard to look effortlessly glamorous, but mostly, it was genuinely chill. People were wandering around in comfy clothes, chatting, laughing. There were families, couples, even a lone wolf with a good book. The staff are super friendly, but also... probably a little understaffed? Our waiter was rushed off his feet most nights but always incredibly polite and helpful. So, yeah, relaxing, but be prepared for a tiny wait at the bar. And don’t expect perfect service, but expect genuine smiles. And that, my friends, is almost as good.
Are there activities? Because I can only stare at scenery for so long before I get restless.
Yes! Thank goodness. Look, I love a good view, but I need something to *do* with the view. There's hiking, which I totally failed at because I am, sadly, not in fantastic shape. There's cycling, which I did manage, but ended up with a completely ridiculous farmer's tan. There is a beautiful pool though, which felt absolutely wonderful after the hike/attempted hike. Oh, and the spa! I had a massage that was so good I nearly fell asleep mid-rubdown. Seriously. I don't *think* I snored, but, well, it was hard to care. They also offer cooking classes which I didn't do, but I definitely would next time. It's a good mix of things to keep you entertained without being overwhelming. And, crucially, there's a bar.
Okay, spill the tea! What was the *worst* part? Give me the real dirt!
Alright, alright, here's the dirt: The walls are… thin. Like, *really* thin. I could have written a play based on the conversations going on in the room next door. I'm pretty sure the gentleman was trying to convince his partner that he wasn't *actually* seeing someone else. And I was up for a lot of that... so much for sleep! I would recommend earplugs. And if you're a light sleeper, you've been warned (and I say this as someone who, generally, is not a light sleeper!). It's like they built the hotel around an old echo chamber, and then, instead of fixing it, just shrugged. But hey, it gave us something to talk about, right? (And, yes, my partner did make a lot of jokes about it.) And the WiFi, the thing that nearly made me leave a negative review, to this very day, is spotty. You have been warned!
Did You Get Any Really Good Photos? Or Was it All a Disaster?
Photos? Ha! This is a good one. I took hundreds of photos. Sunset over the valley? Gorgeous. Me, struggling to climb a hill and looking like a sweaty tomato? Also gorgeous, in a "this is the reality of my life" kind of way. My partner, asleep in the sun by the pool? Priceless. Do I have Instagram-worthy shots? Absolutely. Do I also have a series of blurry shots of my dinner that are probably best served as a warning? You bet. Look, it's a beautiful place. So, yes, there will be photos. But I really think the memories I made there trump the perfect pictures any day.
Would you go back? And if so, what would you do differently?
Would I go back? Absolutely. It wasn’t perfect, there were a few hiccups, and I was probably too quick to judge the food one night. But the good outweighed the bad. I’d go back in a heartbeat. And what would I do differently? Pack earplugs. Bring a portable WiFi hotspot (just in case the signal still sucks). And maybe… just maybe… try to *actually* learn some Spanish before I go. Because, let’s be honest, my attempts to order a coffee were absolutely pathetic. And finally, I would order two desserts every night, just in case one of them wasn’t up to par.
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