Escape to Paradise: Robinson Esquinzo Playa's All-Inclusive Fuerteventura Luxury!
Escape to Paradise: Robinson Esquinzo Playa's All-Inclusive Fuerteventura Luxury!
Escape to Paradise: Robinson Esquinzo Playa - My Fuerteventura Fiasco (and Fantastic Moments!)
Okay, listen, Escape to Paradise: Robinson Esquinzo Playa. The name, right? It sounds idyllic. Like, you'll arrive a stressed-out, work-weary husk and emerge a bronzed, blissed-out deity. And… well, sometimes it works that way. But let's be real, life, even in supposedly paradise-esque resorts, throws you curveballs.
Accessibility: The Good and the "Almost"
First off, accessibility. Big plus points here for Facilities for disabled guests and an elevator. They genuinely try. Wheelchair accessible? Mostly. The main areas are good, but navigating the sprawling complex can be… a workout. Picture me, bless my heart, chasing after my partner, who’s got some mobility issues, like a slightly frantic, sunburnt meerkat. Some pathways are a tad rough, and some ramps could use a serious tune-up. Still, efforts are definitely made, and the staff is generally super helpful.
Arrival - The Check-In Saga (and My Existential Crisis)
The check-in/out [express] option? Yeah, I'd call it more "check-in… with a side of 'wait a minute…'". They tried. The contactless check-in/out was appreciated, especially post-pandemic, but things weren't always seamless. The front desk staff were lovely though, even when there was a small, persistent, and frankly, slightly unnerving issue with our room key. (More on that later).
Rooms: My Sanctuary… Minus the Key Issue
So, the Available in all rooms features are pretty decent. I'm talking air conditioning blasting like a hurricane, finally giving you some much-needed relief from the Fuerteventura furnace, alarm clock, bathrobes begging to be donned, a coffee/tea maker - which is crucial in the mornings - desk for those moments when you have to pretend to work (bleh), a refrigerator that was a lifesaver for keeping the beer cold, a safe box for your valuables (use it!), and Wi-Fi [free] (thank the heavens for this). There's also a television with a plethora of satellite/cable channels to pick from, plus a shower. The window that opens was a godsend for fresh air. Our room even had a balcony, and let me tell you: that first morning, coffee in hand, watching the sunrise? Chef's kiss.
However. Our room? It developed an inexplicable, vendetta against door card keys. Like, we'd leave for breakfast, and BAM, the key refuses to acknowledge us. We'd trek back to reception, key re-programmed, and then… same story. Four times. It felt like a cosmic joke. It definitely tested my patience. I think I probably mumbled something about "hotel room key existentialism" to a bewildered housekeeping lady at one point. But the key issue aside, the daily housekeeping did a stellar job keeping things tidy and the linens were fresh, and the slippers… oh, the slippers. I lived in those things.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking: A Culinary Adventure (Mostly Good)
Okay, the food. This is where things get interesting. First, props for the sheer variety. Breakfast [buffet] and buffet in restaurant were the norm, which is a double edged sword: there are so many options! At first it’s heaven, but a week in you'll start wishing there was a simple "just one plate" option. The Asian breakfast, Asian cuisine in restaurant, Western breakfast, Western cuisine in restaurant were present; the desserts in restaurant were dangerous. There’s a coffee shop which became my daytime office and a poolside bar for sundowners. Be prepared for the "Happy Hour" to be packed and make sure you check out the restaurants. The staff in all the eateries were great and you could ask for a bottle of water whenever you liked.
Then there's the experience of eating, which is where the all inclusive can get murky. The A la carte in restaurant was a nice option for special occasions, but be prepared for your wallet taking a hit if you go wild. There were also alternative meal arrangement options for dietary needs. I'm vegetarian, and I found some okay options, but sometimes, it involved a bit of… creative ordering. One evening I ended up with a plate of what I think was marinated tofu with some wilted greens. (Not gonna lie I was craving a burger!). It was, let’s say, a "unique" culinary adventure.
A Tip: Don't Miss the Poolside Snack Bar
But you know what? I discovered a secret weapon. The snack bar by the pool. This little gem served up some seriously good stuff on demand. The toasties were the bomb, and the salads kept me sane when the buffet felt overwhelming.
Getting Around & Services: Convenient Chaos
Airport transfer (bliss!), car park [free of charge] (yessss!), Daily housekeeping (thank you, sweet angels!), Laundry service (essential), and a concierge who was generally helpful. There's a convenience store for those emergency essentials, and a currency exchange if you need it. Cash withdrawal available too.
However, there was a little bit of a delay getting taxis. I’m talking, “Are we ever going to escape this place?” level of worry. The taxi service generally was fine, just a little bit on the slow side. And while the luggage storage was appreciated, they did lose my favourite pair of sunglasses for a day. (They reappeared, thankfully).
Things to Do, Ways to Relax: Paradise Found (Sometimes)
Okay, so this is partly why you come, right? Swimming pool [outdoor]? Check. Glorious. Several, actually! Pool with view? Absolutely. Breathtaking scenery. Sauna, Spa, Spa/sauna, and steamroom (yes, yes, and yes!). I spent approximately half my vacation time in these places. The Fitness center was well-equipped, though I mostly admired it from my sun lounger. Ahhh the sun lounger… this is where I could spend all day. So relaxing.
And let's talk about the massage. Worth every single Euro. I got a full body massage once. I think I came close to achieving complete and utter Zen. My muscles melted. Seriously, a week of massages and poolside relaxation? I’d recommend it to anyone.
Cleanliness and Safety: The Sanitization Symphony
Post-pandemic, cleanliness and safety are paramount. I was relieved to see the effort put in. Anti-viral cleaning products, daily disinfection in common areas, hand sanitizer, individually-wrapped food options, and a real push for physical distancing of at least 1 meter. The staff trained in safety protocol were very professional, and everything felt as sanitized as could be hoped for. I also saw sterilizing equipment around. It was reassuring to see. Rooms sanitized between stays, and the option for room sanitization opt-out available if you wanted it. The Safe dining setup was on point.
For the Kids: A Family Fiesta (Disclaimer: I don’t have kids)
Babysitting service? Available. Family/child friendly? Absolutely. Kids facilities? They’ve got them. Kids meal? You bet. I witnessed some very happy-looking offspring running around. Seemed like they were having a blast.
My Verdict: Worth a Shot (But Pack Your Sense of Humor)
So, would I recommend Escape to Paradise: Robinson Esquinzo Playa? Yes. Despite the key issues, the slightly wonky accessibility, and the occasional culinary mishap, it was a fantastic vacation. The good stuff vastly outweighed the imperfections. I'm talking about a place where you can actually switch off. The staff did everything they could to make the stay as wonderful as humanly possible.
Just go in with the right expectations and pack your sense of humor. And maybe an extra room key. You've got this. Enjoy paradise!
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Alright, buckle up buttercups, because we're diving headfirst into my Robinson Esquinzo Playa adventure in Fuerteventura! I'm talking sun, sangria, and the inevitable existential crisis that comes with being this ridiculously relaxed. This isn't your perfectly polished travel brochure. This is real.
Day 1: Arrival & the Great Sunbed Hunt (Mayhem Ensues!)
- Morning (ish): Landed! The flight was… well, a flight. I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me snored the entire time. Bless him. Immigration was a breeze, thankfully. My anxiety was already kicking in, mostly because I had a fantasy that my luggage was going to be lost somewhere between London and the Canary Islands. It’s a classic. Then, the glorious, slightly sweaty, Robinson bus shuttle. I remember thinking, "Oh God, the buffet!"
- Afternoon: Check-in. It went smoother than I anticipated. Then, the legendary Sunbed Hunt began. Seriously, Hunger Games, eat your heart out. This is a cutthroat competition for prime pool real estate. Finally, I found a spot, a tiny one but it was mine. I have already tried to claim a spot with a towel early in the morning but it was clearly a mistake because I just got back to the hotel to find my things already collected by some other guest. I was livid. I spent about 30 minutes in the lobby to calm down.
- Evening: Alright, buffet time. Oh, the buffet! It's a glorious, overwhelming orgy of food. Every single dish, every single cake, every single drink. My first plate was so loaded it was a feat. Okay, time travel, I am already regretting my choice to eat the "Mystery Meat." Let the food coma begin. Later, there was a show, like, seriously good. A couple of people kept shouting and making noise, the show was awesome, I have to repeat myself. Bed before 11. Amazing.
Day 2: Ocean Blues & Karaoke Catastrophe
- Morning: Woke up feeling surprisingly sprightly, despite the Mystery Meat incident. Sun, sun, sun. Beach time! The ocean was a breathtaking shade of turquoise. The thought of the beach was amazing but the reality was a bit different, the sand was a nightmare and full of annoying little rocks. Still, the water was warm, so I tried to enjoy myself. I tried to take a picture, it's always a mistake.
- Afternoon: The pool was calling my name, so I gave in, this time with sunscreen. But here, the sun was hitting hard so I got a sunburn on my back. I have to remember that I can't stay in the sun for more than 10 minutes, I really need to learn this!
- Evening: Karaoke night. I LOVE karaoke, I'm not amazing, but I love it. I went to the bar, and I had a couple of drinks. And then… the stage. I might have slightly butchered "Bohemian Rhapsody." The crowd, God bless them, was supportive. I'm pretty sure the waiter was praying for me to finish. Oops.
Day 3: Wandering & Water Woes
- Morning: Decided to be a "cultured traveler" and explore the resort. The first thing I did was to get lost in the maze of little streets of the hotel, I just kept walking, even getting further away from my room. I have to say that the place is big so this is not something that could be easily avoided. I walked all morning, I found a few hidden gems.
- Afternoon: The pool again. I tried to swim, but the water was cold and I quickly changed my mind. After that, I gave up too soon and just went to the bar.
- Evening: More buffet, more sangria. I feel like I've eaten my weight in chorizo. Show time again, but this time, I'm going to sit further away. I need to protect myself from the shouting people.
Day 4: Wind, Wreckage, and (Possibly) Regret
- Morning: Windsurfing. Okay, so I'm not as graceful as I thought. I spent more time face-planting in the water than actually surfing. I can definitely say that this is not my thing. It was fun, though!
- Afternoon: After my "epic" windsurfing fail, I decided to stick to sunbathing. I read a book. I got a tan. All good.
- Evening: Another buffet. I tried everything, I ate everything. I may have been drunk. After my amazing dinner, I walked for a while. I had to skip the show, I was too tired. Sleep like a baby.
Day 5: The Great Escape (Sort Of)
- Morning: I decided to explore outside the resort for a while. I wanted to see the real Fuerteventura. Found a charming little village nearby, I got a nice little cafe but it was too busy with tourists. I was not alone, it seems. I think I was only more tired, and definitely, more hungry.
- Afternoon: Returned to my safe haven (the sunbed). More reading, more relaxing.
- Evening: Buffet, show, repeat. But, you know what? I'm okay with it. It's simple, it's easy, and it's exactly what I needed.
*Day 6: Adios!
- Morning: One last breakfast buffet. One last attempt to get a good spot near the pool. Sigh.
- Afternoon: Checked out, and the transfer back to the airport. The usual rush, the usual wait, and I remember the feeling of being at home.
- Evening: A flight. I was happy to leave.
Random Thoughts & Ramblings:
- The Germans: They are here in force! They love the sunbeds, they love efficiency. And they’re early.
- The Food: Amazing, but I'm worried I'll need a new wardrobe when I get home.
- The Weather: Perfect. Except for the wind. And, as I said, I have to keep my back-to-the-sun policy.
- The People: Mostly lovely, a few interesting characters. The staff? Always smiling, always helpful, even when I’m clearly struggling with the simplest things.
- Overall? Messy, imperfect, and unexpectedly wonderful. I'm definitely not the tanned, toned, perfectly organized traveler I thought I'd be. But hey, who cares? I had a blast (and ate a lot of chorizo). Would I recommend Robinson Esquinzo Playa? Absolutely. (Just bring extra sunscreen and maybe invest in a good pair of earplugs.)
And that, my friends, is my Fuerteventura adventure. Now, where's the chocolate?
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Escape to Paradise: Robinson Esquinzo Playa - The Real Deal FAQ (Because Let's Be Honest, You Need It)
Okay, spill. Is this Robinson Esquinzo Playa *actually* as amazing as the brochures say? Like, REAL amazing?
Ugh, brochures. They’re like the perfectly airbrushed version of your quirky aunt Carol after a few too many sangrias. Look, the *bones* are good. Really good. Picture this: the stark beauty of Fuerteventura, wind-whipped sand dunes, turquoise water that practically begs you to dive in… and the Robinson club itself, a sprawling oasis. BUT… and there's always a but, isn't there?
I went in with ridiculously high expectations. I'd seen the photos, the videos, the glowing reviews. My inner pessimist was practically vibrating, waiting to pounce. And it *did* pounce a few times. The first day? A minor disaster. My luggage got lost (seriously, who loses luggage in a place this remote?!), and I was stuck in the same slightly-too-tight travel outfit for like, twelve hours. Didn’t exactly scream "luxury" when I finally shuffled into the lobby, did it?
But then… the sunset. Oh. My. God. The sky exploded with color. That kind of beauty, you can't fake. And the staff, bless their hearts, were genuinely helpful, even apologetic about my vanished suitcase. Slowly, begrudgingly, my inner cynic began to thaw. So, yes, it's amazing. *Mostly*. Just… temper your expectations slightly, okay? Bring a backup outfit in your carry-on. Trust me.
The food. I need to know about the food. All-inclusive can be a minefield. Tell me it's not just sad buffet slop.
Alright, food. This is where things get… complicated. The main buffet? Yeah, it *is* a buffet. Now, the variety is insane. Seriously. From sushi to paella to questionable sausages (I’m looking at you, mystery meat), it’s all there. You could eat something different every meal for a week, maybe even two.
The quality? Hit and miss. The fresh fish was consistently amazing. *Seriously*, the grilled seabass literally melted in my mouth. The pasta station was a lifesaver after a long day of… well, doing nothing much. But then you stumble across the lukewarm scrambled eggs and the questionable "pâté." It's a lottery, basically. Embrace the adventure!
And the themed nights! The Spanish fiesta night was fantastic - overflowing sangria, sizzling tapas, and a frankly hilarious attempt at flamenco dancing by yours truly. I even saw a kid *faceplant* into a plate of churros! Good times. So, not Michelin-star quality, but it’s definitely not "sad buffet slop." Just… choose wisely, and don't be afraid to try everything (within reason, of course… avoid the suspect sausages!).
What about the activities? I’m a sunbather who likes to occasionally *pretend* to be active. Anything for me?
Oh, honey, you've come to the right place! This place practically *breeds* sunbathers. The beach is… ugh, *stunning*. Soft, white sand, crystal-clear water… I spent a solid few days just draped on a sun lounger, alternating between napping, reading, and pretending I wasn't judging everyone else's choice of swimsuit. (Okay, I *was* judging… a little).
But, for the times you feel the urge to move (and burn off all that buffet food!), there's plenty. Water sports? Oh yeah, kayaks, windsurfing, scuba diving if you're brave. I tried stand-up paddleboarding and nearly drowned - graceful I am *not*. They have a gym (I peeked in once, briefly), tennis courts (looked intimidating), and organised hikes (walked a bit, saw a lizard. Fascinating.)
And the entertainment! Vague music at the beach. Live shows in the evening. I even got dragged into a quiz night, where I managed to answer precisely ZERO questions correctly. But hey, they had free drinks, right? So, yeah, plenty for the "pretend to be active" crew. You'll fit right in. Trust me, I did!
The rooms! Are they actually luxurious? I need a comfy bed, dammit!
Okay, the rooms. This is where things get… variable. I mean, the website promises luxury, right? Ocean views, spacious balconies, plush bedding…
My room? It was… fine. The view was, indeed, lovely (once I got past the initial shock of the lost luggage and the slightly-too-loud air conditioning). The bed? Comfortable enough. The balcony? Perfect for sipping a glass of wine and contemplating the meaning of life (or, you know, judging the swimwear on the beach). But, let’s be honest, it wasn't exactly the Ritz. The décor was a bit… beige. Very beige. And the bathroom could have used a bit more oomph. But hey, I didn't spend much time in the room, did I? I was too busy exploring, eating, and attempting to learn how to paddleboard. So, luxurious-ish? Yes. Perfectly luxurious? Hmm…
Is it good for couples? My partner and I need some serious R&R (and maybe a little romance… if the mood strikes).
Absolutely! This place is practically designed for couples. Imagine: long walks on the beach at sunset, candlelit dinners (if you can snag a table at the a-la-carte restaurant… book *early*), lazy days by the pool, and all that stuff couples do.
I saw lots of loved-up pairs strolling hand-in-hand, whispering sweet nothings, and generally being nauseatingly romantic. (I was single, so I may be a *little* biased here). But seriously, the atmosphere is conducive to romance. If you need to escape the world for a bit with your loved one, this is a great place to do it. Just… maybe skip the quiz night unless you can handle the pressure.
And for families? Is it kid-friendly or is it just a bunch of screaming toddlers terrorizing everyone?
It's… a mix. There are definitely families. They have kids' clubs, playgrounds, and all the things designed to keep the little ones entertained. The beach is a huge draw for families, and the pools are great.
When I was there, I saw a few screaming toddlers. Okay, maybe *more* than a few. But honestly, it wasn't a total disaster. The resort is big enough that you can usually find a quiet corner if you need it. And, let's be honest, most parents are doing their best. So, if you're a family… great. If you’re *not* a family, bring earplugs. Just in case. (And maybe a strong cocktail… for you.)
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