Rotorua's Royal Retreat: Sport of Kings Motel Awaits!
Rotorua's Royal Retreat: Sport of Kings Motel Awaits!
Rotorua's Royal Retreat: Sport of Kings Motel Awaits! - A Messy, Honest Take
Alright, buckle up, buttercups! I've just survived (and maybe even enjoyed?) a stay at Rotorua's "Royal Retreat: Sport of Kings Motel Awaits!" – and let me tell you, it's a journey. This ain't your sterile, perfectly-polished travel blog; this is the raw, unfiltered truth. I'm talking the good, the bad, and the slightly-smelly-of-sulfur-I-swear.
SEO & Metadata Alert (because, you know, algorithms):
(Keywords: Rotorua Hotel Review, Accessible Motel Rotorua, Royal Retreat Sport of Kings, Rotorua Accommodation, Spa Rotorua, Pool Rotorua, Family-Friendly Hotel, Wi-Fi Rotorua, Restaurant Rotorua, Cleanliness Rotorua, Safe Rotorua, Rotorua Travel, New Zealand Hotels)
Let's Dive In (and maybe get a little soggy with the geothermal pools):
First off, the name. "Sport of Kings Motel"? Bit dramatic, yeah? I was half expecting a polo field. Turns out, it's a perfectly decent motel, with a… ahem… unique charm.
Accessibility: This is a HUGE win. They seem to genuinely care. Wheelchair Accessible is a big tick, and I spotted ramps everywhere. The Elevator (thank the heavens!) was a godsend, and they've got Facilities for Disabled Guests which, from what I saw, looked thoughtfully designed. This is a huge plus in a town where the terrain can be a bit… challenging.
Internet, Internet, Internet! (and My Sanity): Okay, listen up, digital nomads! "Free Wi-Fi in all rooms!" They mean it, mostly. Free Wi-Fi is everywhere, which is brilliant, especially when you're stuck on a deadline and haven't seen the light of day in weeks. The Internet [LAN], though… that's a relic of the past. Let's be honest, who's plugging in a cable these days? Still, the Internet services were reliable enough for me to post my scathing reviews online. Ha!
Cleanliness and Safety (and My Overactive Germophobia):
This is where things get interesting. They're clearly trying. The Anti-viral cleaning products are a nice touch, and the Hand sanitizer stations are plentiful. They shout about their Hygiene certification, which I appreciate. The Daily disinfection in common areas did seem to happen, though, I'll be honest, I'm always a little skeptical.
Then there's the Room sanitization opt-out available. Okay, great! …but I'm not sure why anyone would opt out. But the fact that they offer it is a win for choice, right? They also stress Rooms sanitized between stays, which is comforting. The Staff trained in safety protocol, thank goodness. The Safe dining setup actually looked decent. I wasn’t expecting much in Rotorua.
The Big, Bad Sulfur Smell (and My Indoor Voice): Okay, here's the thing about Rotorua. It reeks. And the closer you get to the geothermal activity, the stronger the smell. This isn't the motel's fault, it's just Rotorua's… personality. Embrace it, or you'll be miserable.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking: (Warning: Carb Overload Potential):
The Asian breakfast was a welcome change (I love a good dumpling). The Breakfast [buffet] was… well, a buffet. Standard stuff. Plenty of fuel for a day of sightseeing. The Coffee shop was alright and served strong coffee, thankfully because lord knows you need it when they serve up the Asian cuisine in restaurant, which was surprisingly good. The Poolside bar? Chef's kiss. Perfect for watching the sun set with a cocktail in hand. You can get Salad in restaurant, but after a while, you'll want some Soup in restaurant and maybe a nice Desserts in restaurant.
Things to Do (and My Overwhelmed To-Do List):
Okay, Rotorua is a beast in terms of activities. They have everything under the sun. Things to do include the usual touristy stuff (geysers, Maori culture, etc.). They also have a Fitness center that I never actually used (shame on me). There's a Swimming pool [outdoor] (more on that later). The Spa/sauna called to me, but, alas, I ran out of time. There are also ways to relax. I'd recommend the Sauna.
The Swimming Pool (and My Moment of Zen):
Okay, the pool. This is where things got… magical. The Pool with view was absolutely stunning. The sun glinted off the water, and the steam rising from the geothermal vents created this ethereal landscape. I just sat there, watching the world go by, and for a few glorious minutes, I forgot all about my to-do list. It was the perfect ways to relax I had hoped for. The Swimming pool itself was clean and well-maintained.
Services and Conveniences (because sometimes you just need a laundry):
They have pretty much everything you'd expect. Daily housekeeping kept things tidy. The Laundry service was a lifesaver after I spilled coffee on my favorite shirt. They have Cash withdrawal if you get stranded. They also have an Elevator, which I mentioned, which makes getting around so much easier. The Concierge was helpful with booking tours and offering recommendations, and the Air conditioning in public area which was important in the thick of summer.
For the Kids (and My Inner Child):
Okay, this place is definitely Family/child friendly. They have Babysitting service if you need it (though I didn't use it). There are Kids facilities, which I'm assuming are good. They also offer Kids meal.
Now, For the Dirty Details (aka, the Imperfections):
- The Decor: Let's just say… it's not exactly minimalist chic. Think "comfortable motel with a touch of floral."
- The Room: My room was comfortable enough, if a bit… lived-in. The Bathtub was a bit dinged up. While there was a mirror, I was glad to be able to block out the light with Blackout curtains.
- The Internet, Part 2: The Wi-Fi in my room went a bit wonky a couple of times. Frustrating when you're trying to upload something.
- The Loud Neighbors: This is not the motel's fault, but that's what hotels are for really!
My Verdict: Would I Recommend Rotorua's Royal Retreat?
Yes! Absolutely! It's not perfect, but it's clean, comfortable, and well-located. The staff are friendly, and the amenities are good. The accessibility is a huge plus. It's a great base for exploring Rotorua, and the pool is worth the price of admission alone. Plus, it's got that lovely, slightly-sulfurous charm that sums up Rotorua perfectly.
Final Score: 7.5/10. Bring your sense of humor (and maybe some earplugs, just in case).
Escape to Paradise: Warna Beach Hotel, Lombok's Hidden Gem
Alright, buckle up, buttercup! This ain't your pristine, Instagram-filtered travel itinerary. This is the real, messy, slightly-chaotic account of my supposed "relaxing" getaway to the Sport of Kings Motel in Rotorua, New Zealand. Prepare for a rollercoaster.
Day 1: Rotorua, Here We Come (Eventually)
- Morning (7:00 AM - 9:00 AM): Alarm blares. I slap it into submission. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Packed "smartly" (read: haphazardly) the night before. Realized at the last minute I forgot my hiking boots. Panic ensued. Spent a good twenty minutes rummaging through a mountain of clothes, cursing my future self for not being more organized. Found them under a pile of… I don’t even want to know.
- Mid-Morning (9:00 AM - 12:00 PM): Drive to Rotorua. The drive itself was… well, let's just say I spent most of it white-knuckling the steering wheel. Turns out, New Zealand roads, while stunning, are not exactly forgiving to a driver with a mild fear of heights and a penchant for overthinking every single blind corner. Stopped at a "scenic viewpoint" that was mainly just a patch of grass and a stunning view of… cows. Cows are cool, though. Ended up chatting for a while with a farmer for an hour, who had a surprisingly great knowledge of classic rock.
- Lunch (12:00 PM - 1:00 PM): Glorious pie. Found a little hole-in-the-wall bakery, devoured a meat pie, and nearly lost my mind with joy. New Zealand pies are a national treasure. Seriously, they should be UNESCO-listed.
- Afternoon (2:00 PM - 5:00 PM): Finally arrived at the Sport of Kings Motel. Okay, let's address the elephant in the room – the motel itself. It's not the Four Seasons, let's be clear. But clean and warm and has a certain charm. Checked in and took a moment, after a 4-hour drive and a very important pie, to sit down. It's time for the famous Rotorua mud, but let's rest first.
- Evening (6:00 PM - 9:00 PM): Dinner at a local restaurant. Ordered the lamb shank (because, New Zealand!). Ate way too much. Seriously, I'm pretty sure the waiter side-eyed me. Stumbled back to the motel and collapsed in bed. Watched some terrible TV and fell asleep before the credits even rolled.
Day 2: Mud, Mayhem, and More Mud (and a bit of a rant)
- Morning (8:00 AM - 12:00 PM): This is why I booked this trip! Finally, I went to the Polynesian Spa. I read about the thermal pools in Rotorua before. I expected relaxation. I expected serenity. I expected maybe a tiny, tiny bit of… well, let's not get ahead of ourselves. The mud pool experience, though? It was… intense. Visually, it's a sight to behold. You're basically swimming in a thick, grey sludge. I have a feeling I'll be picking bits of mud out of my hair for weeks. My initial reaction was a mixture of "OMG what have I done?" and a strange sense of… primal joy? Afterward, my skin felt like a baby's bottom. It’s worth it.
- Lunch (12:00 PM - 1:00 PM): Grabbed a quick sandwich. I wasn't feeling fancy, no desire to over-eat.
- Afternoon (1:00 PM - 5:00 PM): I wanted to see the geysers at Te Puia. It was incredible. The geysers! The Maori culture! I felt something. The sheer power of nature. The beauty of the Maori carvings. But, and here's the but, did I mention it was a bit crowded? Felt a bit like Disneyland. "Oh look, another geyser erupting! Awesome! Now, can we get to the gift shop?" Maybe it's just me, maybe I was already tired, but I felt like I never had the chance to connect truly with the experience and the culture.
- Evening (6:00 PM - 9:00 PM): Back at the motel. Decided to order takeaway pizza. Ordered a whole pizza for myself. It was a rough day. It was good, though.
Day 3: Goodbye, Rotorua (and good riddance? maybe not…)
- Morning (8:00 AM - 10:00 AM): Woke up. Said goodbye to Rotorua.
- Mid-Morning (10:00 AM - 12:00 PM): A peaceful drive out of Rotorua, made a mental list of things to do next time.
- Lunch (12:00 PM - 1:00 PM): One last pie. One last moment of culinary bliss. I'm going to miss those pies!
- Afternoon (1:00 PM - 4:00 PM): Drive home.
- Evening (4:00 PM - Onwards): Back home. Unpacked. Put the washing machine on. Started planning my next adventure. Rotorua, you were messy, you were smelly, you were… actually, you were pretty damn amazing, in a weird, geyser-y, mud-covered kind of way. I’ll be back. Maybe. Definitely. Okay, yes, I’ll be back.
Final Thoughts:
This trip was a chaotic mix of awe-inspiring natural beauty, questionable food choices, and a healthy dose of self-deprecating humor. Did I achieve peak relaxation? Maybe not. But I got away. I saw things. I ate delicious pies. And I swam in mud! And despite all my grumbling, I wouldn't trade it for anything. So, yeah, Rotorua. You did your thing. You weird, wonderful, stinky thing. You win.
Umari Bali: Indonesia's Hidden Paradise? (You Won't Believe This!)
Rotorua's Royal Retreat: Sport of Kings Motel Awaits! (FAQs - Because You *Know* You Want the Lowdown)
Okay, Spill. What's the *Deal* with "Sport of Kings" anyway? Sounds... grand.
Alright, alright, settle down. "Sport of Kings" *does* sound a bit pretentious, right? Like you're expecting a champagne fountain and actual royalty. (Spoiler: No champagne fountain. And no actual royalty...unless you count me after a really good soak in the geothermal pool, feeling like a queen... or a king, whatever.) From what I gather, the owners might have been thinking about something like a luxurious, classic motel experience. Think mid-century modern with a kiwi twist. They succeeded a bit, failed a bit, and the result is… well, it's *interesting*. It's Rotorua, so expect a bit of a kitsch-factor. Don't go expecting a Ritz-Carlton. Go expecting something...memorable. I've seen worse, MUCH worse, especially at 3 AM after a few too many of those overly-sweet Rotorua cocktails. (Seriously, drink them. They're a story in themselves.)
Is it Actually In Rotorua Town? Because some places *claim* to be...
Yes! Thank GOD. It's actually *in town*. Thank goodness. It's not like, "20 minutes outside, technically in the district, but you'll need a yak to get anywhere." You’re close enough to smell the sulfur, which, depending on your personal olfactory tolerance, can be a blessing or a curse. I'm firmly in the "character-building" camp. It's a quick drive to the geysers, the Redwood forest... the luge (absolutely MUST do the luge, even if you're a complete scaredy-cat like me. The views! Oh, the views!). You can *walk* to some restaurants, which, let’s be honest, is a huge plus when you're sampling Rotorua's culinary delights (and by 'delights' I mean, well, you'll find out). It's a good base camp.
What are the Rooms Actually Like? Give it to me straight. Did they have a toilet?
Okay, the rooms. Let's get real, shall we? They’re… functional. They haven't been updated *recently*. Think "slightly dated, but clean-ish." I'm not saying it's a dive, but the decor is... a *choice*. You might find some floral wallpaper that's seen better days, and maybe a vintage alarm clock that's probably older than you are. (Mine was. It was set to like, 1978. I haven't been born in 1978). And YES, they had a toilet. Crucially, it flushed. Which, after some of the backpacking hostels I've endured, is a genuine win. The beds? They’re beds. Not luxury mattresses, but they’re serviceable. Clean sheets, thank heavens. The towels were… well, they were *there*. I've brought my own fluffier ones the second time. If you're high-maintenance, consider packing your own everything. But honestly, it's Rotorua. You're there to explore, not live in luxury. Right? ...Right?
That Geothermal Pool... Seriously? Is it Gross?
The geothermal pool. *This* is where things get interesting. Actually... it's more than interesting. It's the *highlight*. The absolute best thing about the whole *place*. Forget the slightly dusty decor and the questionable coffee machine. The pool is… glorious. It's naturally heated by the geothermal activity Rotorua is famous for. The water is warm, sometimes even *too* warm (in the best way possible). It's got that unique, slightly sulfuric smell that you either love or hate, but honestly? You get used to it. And it's *so* damn relaxing. I swear, I spent a good three hours in that pool, just floating, watching the steam rise, and feeling every single one of my muscles melt. Pure bliss. It's the kind of bliss that erases all doubts about the slightly questionable carpet in the hallway. It's the kind of bliss that makes you forgive the occasional slightly-off plumbing sound. Be warned though, you might emerge looking like a lobster. Embrace it!
Food! Where Do I Eat? (And is there breakfast?)
Breakfast? Technically, maybe. "Continental" is the word they use. Think: cold cereal, maybe some sad-looking toast, and instant coffee. It's…enough to get you started. But honestly? *Skip it*. Rotorua is full of amazing cafes. Go find yourself a proper Kiwi breakfast. Take, for example, the cafe just down the road. The poached eggs? Incredible. The coffee? Proper stuff. As for other meals: there's everything from fancy restaurants to casual eateries. Rotorua caters to all budgets. Ask the staff at the motel for recommendations; they often know the best local spots. Heads up: some places close early, so plan ahead, especially if you're arriving late. And *definitely* try the Hangi - traditional Maori cooking. It's an experience. (And delicious.)
Okay, The Downside? What Annoyed You the Most? (Be Honest!)
Okay, honesty time. The Wi-Fi was a bit… dodgy. I mean, it *worked*, eventually. But don't expect to stream your favorite shows without a fight. Pack a good book, or embrace the digital detox. The soundproofing? Not great. You can hear your neighbors, especially if they're, shall we say, *enthusiastic*. And the parking… it's a bit tight. But these are minor quibbles. The biggest downside? Leaving. After that geothermal pool, I didn't *want* to leave. I wanted to move in. Just a little hint: pack a sleep mask. The curtains aren't exactly blackout. And if you're a light sleeper, earplugs might be a good idea. Especially if there are roadworks. (There always seem to be roadworks in Rotorua. It's part of the charm... I think.)
Value for Money? Is it Worth It?
Here's the thing: Rotorua can be expensive. So, is the Sport of Kings worth it? Absolutely. For the price, you get a decent, albeit slightly dated, room, and *that pool*. The pool alone is worth the price of admission. Factor in the location, the friendly staff (they were genuinely lovely and helpful), and the overall Rotorua experience... yeah, it's good value. I've definitely stayed in places that cost *more* and were *much* worse. Consider it a solid, budget-friendly option if you're planning to spend most of your time exploring, and using the motel as a base. Just remember to pack those earplEscape to London: Your Perfect Clapham Guesthouse Awaits!
Post a Comment for "Rotorua's Royal Retreat: Sport of Kings Motel Awaits!"